Get me a stepladder and I will

"Shibboleth" is the most appropriate word for it, I think: a phrase or pronunciation that distinguishes people from a particular place. The question "Do you know the Five Lamps?", and the response which an affirmation elicits is only funny to people from Dublin. I certainly don't get it, but it cracks up every Dub I know, every time. If you're smiling while you're reading this, it's because you're from Dublin.

So it makes the ideal name for the latest Dublin-themed beer on the market: named for a genuine landmark, but with a nod-wink in-joke for the locals included. The culchie in the group wants to know why the Dubs are all laughing when the round is brought in, and further hilarity ensues. Shibboleths make good branding.

The visual aspects of the Five Lamps branding is unimpeachable too, invoking Victorian wrought-iron and really feeling like part of the fabric of classic Dublin boozer McDaid's where I was drinking it. It's a very clear pale lager, showing that whichever brewery is producing it under contract knows what they're doing with the style.

The first thing I notice on taking the first sip, however, is the carbonation: massive amounts of mouth-stripping fizz giving it an immediate dryness which makes it hard to find anything else going on. When it comes, the next hit is an astringent bitterness, as found in the sterner sort of German pils. This is contrasted with, rather than complemented by, a sweet biscuit and golden syrup finish, the sort you find in many a decent pale Czech lager. So, all the elements of good pils are in here but for me they just didn't quite gel together.

Lager is a tough sell, and even more so now that three independent Irish brands are fighting it out in the pubs against the big locally-brewed international brands and the fashionable imports. That said, all three are big on their sense of place -- Dingle for Crean's and Carrick-on-Shannon for Carrig -- and this is the only Dublin-centric one among them. Pale lager, if you will. Perhaps that will be enough to carry it.

I suspect they may need to do something a bit more elaborate with the tap font, though. How many familiar brands do you see before you spot the Five Lamps badge on the bar in McDaid's?

Better butter, but bitter

A few weeks ago I asked one of the people behind Tom Crean's Lager why they decided to put out that style of beer. The answer was that no-one else seemed to be doing it. And it's true: most of the independents don't do lager, and those that do are mainly the ones who own pubs in which to push it. Of course, you don't have to be a Pattinson-grade beer historian to notice the slew of failed independent Irish lager brands strewn across the not-too-distant past: Kinsale and Brew No. 1 being especially high profile examples, as these things go. Despite it occupying some 63% of Ireland's beer market, the absolute dominance of the Big Two and their pervasive marketing makes lager a tough sell.

Hot on the heels of Crean's into this deceptively healthy-looking market segment comes Carrig. The brand is owned by a couple of entrepreneurs and the beer itself is produced at the BrewEyed plant in Co. Offaly. I thought the BrewEyed lager was pretty decent the one time I tried it, so had reasonably high expectations for this when I trotted along to The Palace for a taste.

At first my expectations were met: cold from the tap the first sip revealed a beautifully clean and crisp lager which, though lacking any real hop flavour, packed an enjoyable lip-smacking bitterness. It unravelled quite quickly after that, however. Our old friend Mr Diacetyl came calling, and proceeded to shout loudly over the top of everyone else. The bitterness just manages to reassert itself and take the edge off the worst butteriness, but the diacetyl lingers and grows with each mouthful making a second pint an unappealing proposition.

In the battle of the new microbrewed lagers I would put this a little ahead of Crean's, but both are clear indications of the other main reason Irish micros don't do lager: it's a very difficult style to do well. A quality Irish pilsner, of the kind I thought Carrig was, would be very welcome and might just stand a better chance of making a name for itself in this closely fought corner.